I hear that my father is angry with me.

How does one deal with the elderizing of one's parent(s)?

My father, I am told by a source close to his wife, is quite angry with me due to the role I have played in his inability to drive.

Don't get me wrong, I love my dad and respect him very much. But the fact is, he should no longer be behind the wheel. Driving is a major part of his life, and I think to him it is the last symbol of independence he still has.

He was a professional driver for many years, and has always been an excellent driver, and probably still is, or, rather, would be if he had better vision, faster reaction times and could feel his feet. But facts are facts and I just think he has become a danger to himself and others. Apparently my expressing that opinion has created ire.

Never mind my opinion; the DMV recently sent him paperwork that had to be signed by all his doctors and returned within 30 days certifying his fitness to drive. Only one doctor has signed off on it. Two others have refused to. And therein lies the rub.

So... anyway, apparently he is angry with me. Or at me. Or something. Yes, that bothers me, and I'd be lying if I said I shrug it off easily.

Anybody have any experience with a parent losing their license who can help me deal with it and know how to address it when the topic comes up during my next visit up there the first week of next month?

(I know I will be dealing with the loss of my driving abilities someday, and driving means as much to me as it does to him; I only hope I can face and accept that phase of my life with grace.)


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